LeaAnn

Several years ago, we planted a tree, and in tribute to the PBS painter, Bob Ross, it seemed fitting that "a nice little tree will live right there..." in our front yard. We named her LeaAnn after a lady we knew who was slender and had red hair. Not to mention the dark roots.

LeaAnn grew and grew and became a beautiful, substantial specimen with a mature figure, not a wispy, girlish thing. She was some variety of maple with bountiful leaves and exquisite red color in the fall that lasted well into winter.

Until one summer night there was a terrible crash outside our open windows. Followed by screeching tires, a roaring engine, and I had to get up and figure out what was happening. After all, it was 3 in the morning, bar-closing time in our neighborhood.

LeaAnn was leaning over, like she wanted to take a nap. But it was more than a nap, her bark was terribly skinned, roots ripped off. She was a goner. There was a huge pool and then trail of antifreeze wandering off into the distance, and it irritated me to the point that I grabbed some keys and took off following the trail.

I located the car, but the Kansas City police were less than impressed with my tale of tree murder. They apparently had to polish off a donut before they showed up, anyway.

Turns out, the guy driving the older Cadillac was a fellow who had a long-term drinking problem. Whoa, who could have known! The car was parked (or quit) in the back yard of a house about three blocks away, and we eventually learned that the "perp" (got the lingo) had been hired by the homeowner a while back to do some odd jobs, trying to help the guy get past a rough spot. Then he started to threaten, harass and beg for money to buy booze. The homeowner became ill and discovered again that no good deed goes unpunished. He also learned that restraining orders are pretty much a waste of time, effort and money.

Don't know if this is the same problem, but I was awakened last night at about 1 o'clock and noticed something amiss in the front yard. We had LeaAnn-icide all over again.

Yep, that's our mailbox, the one by our neighbor's car is actually ours. Car parts can be seen, and there were a bunch of them. At least the mailbox took a pound of flesh.

This on top of the fact that I am getting a bit frustrated with the computer issues. But that's another story.

We'll figure it out.